My Life in Two Days

Two days ago, a woman greeted me, "Man! Hey, wassup?"

I was shocked. Not because she jumped at me or anything. Not because she was beautiful. But because she was beautiful and I didn't remember her. No, I didn't just forget her name, I didn't even recognize her. Even as we spoke, and she displayed a great knowledge about me, I couldn't help thinking, "Who is this woman who seems to know me well?"

After some heated discussions about, intentionally, nonpersonal subjects ("I believe Ketoprak should be named our national food"), we parted. I got her name, yet I still couldn't remember her.

It bugs me when I forget about a beautiful/ugly person. There are three kinds of faces: ugly, average, and striking (handsome or beautiful). The first and the last are easy to remember. But you can forget an average-looking person easily. Put that in mind the next time someone from your past forgets about you. You shouldn't get offended. Take it as a way of her saying, "You're not ugly."

Anyway, at the time, it made me doubt myself. "Am I that old?" "Or maybe she was an ugly-duckling turning into a swan?" "Oh, I get it! This is a prank and I'm on TV."

This disturbed me so much that I talked about it with my partner. "...because she was beautiful!" I exclaimed.

And she suddenly shifted her position.

This was the moment I could hear alarm ringing in my head. Wrong move, buddy. Little people inside my mind ran away in terrors, while the Captain shouted, "Prepare for impact!"

But she only sat there and heard me finish talking. And nothing happened. I couldn't believe my luck. I'm married to a woman who's actually okay with that. Mars-Venus crapus. She even gave me a surprise present this morning. A little package wrapped in dashing red paper. She must've slid it in my bag after breakfast. How nice of her! I'm planning to open it after I finish typing this. I can hear some kind of ticking from inside, though. Sounds like a clock. Or mayb