Thursday, November 25, 2004

Godzilla Has Left Levelled The Building

One of the local TV station's been airing Godzilla movies everyday. Suddenly, I'm nine year old again.

To me, Godzilla is the thing. There's no other thing. Not even The Thing or The Swamp Thing. Godzilla's the thing.

Reason #1: UNGCC. United Nation's Godzilla Control Center. No other single living being has a UN organization devoted to its countermeasures (except for George W. Bush).

Reason #2: Godzilla is one bad mother who doesn't care about dental hygiene. He has this atomic flame breath that incinerates everything in its path. Try persuading him into using a breath spray.

And I just feel for him. I mean, if Big G ever wanted to make amends, he couldn't. He greeted from the sea, "Yo, wassup people!" Fifty foot tsunami hit the town. He burped, buildings were washed away in flames. "Sorry, did I do that?" He asked for forgiveness but armies replied with missiles.

All he needs is an intelligent conversation. So here's what you can do. Below is his bio. Anybody interested just give him a buzz. Or drop an atom bomb. He'll wreck your town (or what's left of it) in no time.


THE KING OF MONSTERS' PROFILE

Name: Godzilla, aka King of Monsters, aka Gojira, aka Big G.

Age: 50 years

Sex: No, but I have a child

Hobbies:
Destroying Tokyo, Stomping Tokyo, and Incinerating Tokyo.

Interested in Meeting:
Activity Partners (see Hobbies).

Question That You Always Want to Ask:
Why the hell do these people keep staying in Tokyo?

Retirement Plan:
People assume I'd love to build my own demolition company,"Godzilla and Co." Cute. But what I really wanna be is a real estate agent.


PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTIONS

What does "G" in "Kenny G" stand for? Have you ever seen Godzilla and Kenny G together? You don't say...

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