Thursday, June 05, 2008

The Good Game Brings Players Straight To Hell

My partner recently bought a boardgame called Good Game. It's supposed to teach muslim kids to know right from wrong. Take the properties out of Monopoly and change the location names into morals, and that's basically it.

The way to win is to get the highest scores, by tallying acquired positive and negative moral scores.

Here, we see sport ("Olahraga") and cleanliness ("Menjaga kebersihan") worth 10 and 20 points respectively. While being cheapskate ("Pelit") costs you 20 points.

At certain points, the kids may draw Pilihan, its equivalent to Monopoly's Chance. It also determines your scores.

However, certain cards like this ("Kafir!" = "Heathen!") will bring you straight to hell, and lose the game.

So the first lesson this game teaches our children: if everyone around you goes to hell, you win!

The second: moral is a Machiavellian thing. The bottom line's what matters most.

For instance, getting involved in a premarital romantic relationship ("Pacaran") is a no-no in conservative Islam. Therefore, you get minus 500 points.

On the other hand, if you get married ("Nikah"), you can bring home 250 points. How cool is that?

The children who play this game will note that, in the future, they could get married twice to even the score. In a couple decades or so, they will one day be influential figures in the society like Hamzah Haz.

If that's not heartwarming enough for you, we can see another important lesson they might get; manslaughter ("Membunuh orang") is BAD. But it evens out in the end if you study diligently ("Rajin belajar"). After brutally maiming other people in the name of God, I guess those FPI guys come home to study during the night. And if those victims don't die, more power to you.

Ha ha! Of course I'm kidding. It's not that easy. Because there's a strict condition: you have to be firm.

Doubtfulness ("Ragu-ragu") will get you minus 100 points; studying dilligently won't cut it. So if you're involved in a mob attack (in the name of God, of course) never hesitate in attacking defenseless children or their mothers.

As for me, I've learned two extra things: prepare a Get Out of Hell Free Card. And don't mess with diligent people: they may have positive scores to spare.


Therry said...


First of all, you finally updated - yay!

Secondly ... uhmm. I wonder whether FPI extremists grew up playing the very same board game that you just bought, except that they took everything WAY too seriously?

Ultratupai said...

Great post. It's crazy. I agree with the other comment.

pjbali said...

Lets see

Pacaran = -500

Bunuh Orang = -100

So on the badness scale having a girfriend is 5 X worse than murder?? wtf?

Maybe you need to edit the deck before you turn the kids loose on this one.

isman said...

"Pertamax!"? Now, now, Therry, just because you've moved to wordpress doesn't mean you have to act like the masses, heheh.

Yes, ultratupai. If someone used his common sense to design this game (or maiming defenseless people in the name of God, for that matter), I wonder whether the term "common" is approriate.

Bunuh orang is actually -1000. You missed a zero there, pjbali. So it's actually equivalent to going steady with two people at the same time. (Which could lead to murder, if you think about it, har har.)

rimafauzi said...

The fool has updated.

I linked your blog to mine cos I used have a slogan that I found here.

Nice boardgame. It surely puts things into perspective. My life is full of minuses, I should do more studying then. I figure, if I study every night for a year and marry 4 times more, I will have erased all sins.

This is very good to know.

Therry said...

So how many more marriages you've got to go, Rim??

Can you marry two people at the same time, as a shortcut?

isman said...

Marrying more than one people at the same time may appear as a good shortcut, Rima and Therry. But in practice, it may tempt us to commit murder. So it's a gamble based on our thin line of patience, really.

rimafauzi said...

I'm patient. Husband tells me he will die young, all the men in his family die young before 50 and he is the last one. He is currently 44, so he tells me the most I have to wait til he dies is 6 years.

Of course I protested, cos by the time he dies, I will not be very young and it will be a bit harder to find another husband. Told him if he wanted to die to do it sooner, no more than 3 years from now. I have prepared his life insurance and everything. Just in case.

A friend suggested arsenic. But we'll see.
:p said...

Is this a real game? I've been wondering about this very concept myself. It's an interesting side of a strong religion.

isman said...

Rima, let me know if I've ever offended you. Allow me a chance to apologize.

Unfortunately it is, Jen. But fortunately, it doesn't sell that well. Donna bought it at a clearance sale. Of which I hope for the right reasons.

Teaching morals to kids through games is a concept which appeal to many parents. Very convenient. However, this one just does it really, really bad.

burumun said...

hoo jadi kalo gua mau bunuh orang, harus kawin 4 kali dong ya?
Kalo cewek juga boleh kawin 4 kali, with overlap? :P

von Ebenhaum said...

Hah! Call me if you are planning to execute that plan, Burumun. Altho, I have to admit that I would hate to be in the position of the 'murdered' person.

Hehe. Great game! I'll go grab some of those Get out of hell free cards before we play this game, Man.

In fact, I'll share some of them for you too. Just in case. Don't wanna play the game alone. For $5, it's a must. :D

isman said...

Since polyandry is not common, to be able to marry four guys in your lifetime, you might need to resolve to murder in the first place, Fion.

Yes. Spare some of the cards and be a savior, dear von. "I save thee from thy hellish fate." Fling a card.

Alex said...

Oh well, maybe the one that goes around and kill people have the get out of hell free card already.

... or they're convinced that they have it. :P

therry said...

dude! check your sidebars (especially the title of the blog roll).

See anything strange? hehe.

Must've copy pasted it in the wrong box? Damn typo :P~

isman said...

I tawt I taw a therrysays.

Ohkay, rule number #7: never edit your blog layout while watching late night football.

therry said...

actually it was Rima who noticed it first then I went to look and I was like "Whoa. Dude must've loved my new blog baaaaaaaaaaaaad"

late night soccer? same here. beau's been the victim of it too - eyes red with fatigue and sleepiness, sore throat from staying up late and in the end he starts to miss more and more matches. LOL

Jali said...

LOL!! baru baca dan ngakak sendiri gak jelas :))

Nury Vittachi said...

Dear Isman, i love your post on the Muslim game and will quote it on my website -- I really enjoyed your comments.
best wishes

Erick S. said...

Humm... personally, I think the game is quite disturbing, so I guess it should be distributed to every children in every house...

Erick S. said...

Uhh, since it's disturbing and so on, can I get a permission to post this to my friends?

Tararengkyu before.

isman said...

Jali, ngakak jelas itu gimana, ya? Hehe.

Thanks, Nury.

To ensure they grow up as disturbed as us, Eric? That'd be interesting. I mean, having kids who'll support their dad marry again.

Sure thing, post away.

Anonymous said...

Nice post, where can I get one?
I'd like to buy one.